The World according to yaya

Friday, March 03, 2006

6 months in a leaky boat

It has been six months since my Mum went on her journey. I like that saying - went on 'her journey', it makes me feel that she is still around just in a different place. I miss her terribly but I have been going to counselling and now feel I can grieve without grieving. I think about her all the time, however now the memories make me smile as well as cry. I wish you could have all known her, and that she could have all known you.

My Mum's journey has left me thinking a lot about my own journey - the one I am experiencing here and now. I am usually a person of procastination - I say I am going to do a lot of things, that I want to try something or that I have always wanted to be some way and then it just passes and I let it. But in the last six months, I have been evaluating what is really important me and instead of talking about doing stuff, or dreaming of what I want to do and be - I am doing it. And being it.

For instance, I have learnt to meditate. I am not fantastic at it but I am doing it and enjoying it. My friends and I have started an art group and once a month we meet to create and be creative. We have booked a stall at a market and are looking forward to sharing our output. And I love it.
I am walking everyday and eating healthy, not because I want to lose weight but because I want to live the best life I can and being healthy is a part of that. And I am excited by it.
I am doing a sponsored walk on Mothers Day, in memory of my mother and to raise funds for Kahlilla, a very special girl who has neuroblastoma and who I will do anything to help (www.kahlilla.com). And I am looking forward to it.
I am having a girls-only 80's themed birthday party because I want to celebrate all that this life and this journey has to offer. And also because I have always wanted to and so I am going to. And I am estatic about it.
I am writing this blog because it means so much to me, to read all about you wonderful bloggers and your wonderful lives and to feel a connection to each and every one of you. And it is one of the best things I have ever done.
My Mum gave me the gift of life. Now she is teaching me how to appreciate it. Thank you Mum - I love you.